Honoring People Who Graced My Life - Lost Love by M Pax

Lost love week here on Kai’s fabulous blog. Thanks for having me on, Kai.
   I chose this topic because loss was on my mind a lot in 2011. My sister lost her husband in 2011 very unexpectedly. The shock was...well, I journaled about it on my way to be with her and her family, then on my way home. I’m not sure it has entirely worn off yet. What? I’m really not going to laugh with him ever again? That can’t be true.
   None of that has entered my stories yet because it is still too new and too fresh.
   When we are expecting a loss, although it hurts just as much, it’s not the same as a sudden loss. Those blindsides take extra processing. It seemed so unreal at the beginning. This can’t be true. He can’t be gone. He was just here. We had no warning. And I have some distance. I can’t even begin to imagine how my sister copes.
   Eventually, both he and my recorded thoughts from those days will make it into my stories. It’s a great homage to people who have meant something to me in life.
   Years ago I had a lovely internet friend I spoke to everyday, then she disappeared. We found out about a week later she had died suddenly from a stroke. There were a group of us who spoke regularly online then and I promised to memorialize her as a character in one of my stories one day.
   I finally did. The novel I’ll be releasing this summer has a character named for her and who takes on many of her online traits. The actual appearance, well, it was science fictionalized. I had never based an entire character on somebody I actually knew before and found it a challenge. I wanted to get it right, wanted everyone to feel the loveliness she was when alive.
   From the reactions I’ve gotten from my critique partners, I’d say I got her character right. And, I’ve decided it would be something I’d do again, honoring people who had graced my life with their loveliness.
   Is this something you’ve done, or thought about doing?
M. Pax blogs at Wistful Nebulae and at MPax-TheWebsite. She spends her summers as a star guide at Pine Mountain Observatory and has a slight obsession with Jane Austen. Author of Semper Audacia and the free reads Plantgirl, Translations and Small Graces. Coming in 2012: The Backworlds, Stopover at theBackworlds' Edge, The Tumbas and The Augmentation of Hetty Locklear.

Comments

  1. M PaxFebruary 21, 2012 at 4:51 PM

    Thanks for having me on, Kai. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Kai Strand, AuthorFebruary 21, 2012 at 7:26 PM

      I'm so glad you participated. I'm sorry for your family's loss. I'm sure it provides some comfort to know you can eventually immortalize him in a story.

      Delete
  2. RettaFebruary 23, 2012 at 12:54 AM

    Oh, what a wonderful way to remember your brother in law. Loss is hard enough, but you are right. When it's a surprise, it's like we didn't even get a chance to prepare. Like being sucker punched.

    I think it's special that you can allow those feelings to be a part of your writing. That takes courage, I think, to be vulnerable that way.

    And as someone who had a character named after her, I know what an honor it is!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Alex J. CavanaughFebruary 23, 2012 at 5:10 AM

    I'll have to read your book to discover who she was. I've had two online friends die and another just vanished. It's really sad to see their blogs, empty now.

    ReplyDelete
  4. M PaxFebruary 23, 2012 at 7:52 AM

    It is quite a sucker punch, Loretta. :) The Tumbas is being formatted for the publisher. So your namesake should have a publication date soon. :D

    I used to be on the Stargate forums, Alex. So, it was someone I knew from those.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Empty Nest InsiderFebruary 24, 2012 at 12:17 AM

    I'm so sorry about your brother-in-law Mary. I'm sure you will write a wonderful story about him one day. It's so nice that you're honoring your Internet friend, and I look forward to reading more about her. Julie

    ReplyDelete
  6. M PaxFebruary 24, 2012 at 7:09 AM

    Thanks, Julie.

    ReplyDelete

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